I'll begin with a warning, this intro's pretty cliche, but it's true: There are people in your life who are only with you a little while, but who you don't feel like you'll ever forget. By the time I was twenty years old, I'd lost three grandpas and a great-grandma. These losses were painful, and I still miss these grandparents so much. But they all professed faith in Jesus, and so I can at least take peace in knowing that, if they knew Him, they are in a better place, and I can see them again someday.
But what about people who leave your life by choice, and who could still be around? What about someone who leaves your life and what was once theirs because of heartache, fear, struggle, or something else? Anything else? What about someone who shows you love and friendship, then walks away without a word?
This is something that I'm struggling with now. I have..had? no, I'm still saying have, at least while I can. I have a friend who I didn't know extremely well, but who was there for me and my family in some of our happy and saddest times. He stuck with us when we lost my grandpa, when no one would have expected it of him. He was there for fun times too, celebrating with us and making me laugh. I saw him just a month ago when my parents celebrated their anniversary, and all seemed well..or maybe it didn't..not quite. I don't know now, because my memory seems visible only through the lens of what I know now. In any case, I guess it wasn't ok.
He's gone now..or maybe getting ready to leave. I only sort of know where to. And he seems to have tried to cut all ties with his life and the people here. At least the ones I know. I know something has happened, I'm not positive what. I'm all but positive he's hurting in some way, and I want so much to see or talk to him again, to know what's going on. I wish I could ask, or listen, or just have him know that I want to be his friend no matter what is going on. But I can't, because I can't find him and don't know if I ever will. The thought of this is still kind of sinking in maybe, and the weight of it increases as it does so.
I've seen loved ones hurt and been sad because I couldn't seem to help. But longing to help someone I can't even see anymore is possibly harder. For now, I guess all I can do is pray that God's love..or the feeling of it..finds him where he is, and that God, Who knows and loves him better, will take care of him..wow, I say "all I can do" as though whatever else I might do would be more effective? I suppose I can be pretty ridiculous like that. If anyone else should happen to read this at some point, I hope that you will say a quick pray for him too. Thanks,<3
I'm all out of words, there's nothing I could say to you, to take away the hurt, so let me pray you through♥
This is what I long to say to you, if I had one chance to tell you something: You are LOVED, more than you can imagine..
